Tabuu Wrap-up: Ditch the boring and mediocre by exploring the juicy stuff to create a sex positive life!
How did your sex education begin? Did your parents give you the infamous talk? Or was it through sex-ed at school? In many places, sex education is reduced to the understanding of reproduction and the prevention of STI. However, there’s a lot more to it than that, and reducing the focus only to those two topics leaves out many other important aspects of sexuality.
As a result, we group with this limited idea of sexuality and sex which often causes confusion and makes us afraid of venturing beyond standard, “vanilla” sex. This is a huge issue because it prevents us from exploring the vast ocean of possibilities for our bodies and our senses. If you want to learn past the limit, here are 5 ways to become more sex-positive!
Anatomy is one of the most important topics left out of sex education. As a result, we develop a very limited understanding of all the pleasure zones in our bodies, how they work, and how we can play with them. So, if you want to become more sex-positive, start with anatomy and look up how bodies work and what the pleasure zones are for men and women.
People look at porn under a really bad light, ignoring it can be very useful and informative. Yes, porn is not always very realistic, but some porn will teach you a lot about pleasure. Look for porn that’s structured around specific pleasure zones, sex acts, fantasies, kink, and more. Tristan Taormino’s movies are a great place to start because they cover many topics and there’s a lot to learn there.
3. Sensory Play
Sensory play is truly incredible in the bedroom. Whether you’re playing in little league with oils and massages, ice cubes, etc., or you’re going pro with bondage, wax, wtc., you’ll have a ton of fun. The easiest way to get started with sensory play is using a blindfold; limiting one sense will intensify the others and it will build anticipation, making the sex 10 times better.
4. Learn to Communicate
When you’re not properly educated about sex, communication is anything but easy. Pleasure is not a topic you explore during sex ed, so it can make it difficult to talk to partners about it in the future. Heck, it’s even difficult to talk about pleasure with yourself!
You feel shame and embarrassment, it’s uncomfortable and you don’t know what yo say. But don’t worry, you can fix this by learning to communicate more efficiently. Start by talking about pleasure with yourself, explore your desires and erotic thoughts. Then bring it up to your friends or partners, as long as there’s trust and consent there’s no reason to feel ashamed.
Whether that’s teaching your children about sex ed more openly than you were taught, signing petitions, donating, or advocating, you must support inclusive sex education any way you can. It’s not enough to teach yourself, share your knowledge with others positively, and push inclusive sex education forward.